The Art of Speaking Up

48 | Silence the noise of self-criticism so you can unleash your deepest strengths, powers, & ambitions

Do you find yourself getting swept away by the negative chatter that permeates your mind?

 

Do you feel like sometimes you are struggling because you’re getting in your own way?

 

Do you wish you could see yourself in a more positive, optimistic light?

 

If the answer is yes, this episode is for you!  In this solo episode, I walk you through a model that I use to help calm the noise of self-criticism, and be my own strongest supporter.

 

If you relate – let me know!  Come chat with me on Instagram - @theartofspeakingup

 

In the meantime – have a fabulous week!

47 | Building unshakeable inner strength + refusing to compromise on your goals and dreams with Qaali Hussein

**Check out Qaali’s brand new podcast here!**

https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/professional-muslim-women/id1477502689

 

And check out her article here:

https://opmed.doximity.com/articles/youre-the-surgeon-56cb2f1fb6c8

~~~

This week, I’m talking with trauma surgeon Qaali Hussein all about her medical career, and the challenges she’s faced at work and in life and she pursued her dream of being a mom and becoming a surgeon at the same time.

 

Qaali broke major barriers in her industry - being pregnant while training to become a surgeon is not widely accepted in the medical community, and her identity as a Muslim women subjected her to even greater scrutiny as she moved ahead and attempted to build a career while being true to who she is.

 

Through her journey, she built a core of unshakeable strength and confidence - and she shares this journey with us in today’s conversation.  

 

Be sure to check out her show, and as always, please reach out to me on instagram (@theartofspeakingup) and let me know what you think!

 

Have an amazing week (:

46 | Tap into your unique gifts & superpowers and finally stop worrying about what other people think with Tami Lyon

In today’s episode, I’m talking with a listener of the podcast, Tami Lyons!  In this interview, she opens up about how her mindset got in her own way professionally, and how she learned to let go of self-questioning and constant worrying about what other people think.

 

In this interview, you’ll hear Tami and I talk about:

 

• Tami’s evolution and mindset growth
• Tami’s early career struggle
• How to handle confusion, ambiguity, and struggle
• Self talk
• Self criticism vs. Self encouragement
• Uncovering strengths
• Using strengths to overcome challenges

 

And so much more!

In addition to running a ski school, Tami has spent much of her career in the corporate world. She currently works as a fractional CEO with How to Manage a Small Firm, where she provides CEO services to small and silo practitioner law firms. 

A HUGE thank you to Tami for coming on the show and sharing her story.  Please take a moment to let us know if you liked this conversation by rating and reviewing us in the Apple podcasts app!

 

As always, thanks for tuning in and I’ll catch you next week!

 

-Jess

45 | Let go of struggle and bring more joy, ease, and confidence into life & work with Charlotte Kaye

Welcome to a summer bonus episode!  In this bonus episode I’m chatting with a good friend of mine and women’s empowerment coach Charlotte Kaye.  Charlotte used to be in the 9-5 world, and now coaches women to help them set boundaries and take control of their lives.  In this episode, we explore some interesting themes:

 

-The importance of letting go, and accepting people for who they are at work

 

-What to do when negative feelings arise at work

 

-How to feel more joy and ease in the workplace

 

-How to learn to appreciate coworkers

 

-How to build the courage to be yourself at work

 

And much more!

 

To get in touch with Charlotte, follow her on Instagram (@airyfairyfeminist) and check out her website at https://www.airyfairyfeminist.com/

 

And be sure to check out her free 5 day boundary setting challenge:  https://www.airyfairyfeminist.com/saynochallenge

 

As always, thanks for tuning in and I’ll catch you in September for the premier of Season 3!!

 

(I can’t wait….)

 

-Jess

44 | You can 100% find the confidence to pursue your next promotion - even if you struggle with self-doubt

Come join me on Instagram (@theartofspeakingup)!

Today’s bonus episode is intended to help you build courage if you know you want something more for your career, but find yourself questioning – “Am I actually good enough?”

Spoiler: the answer is YES!  You are.

But listen to this episode if you need a little bit of help to get there!

43 | Leave fear behind and show up bigger than you ever have before (Season 2 finale)

Welcome to the Finale of Season 2 of the show!

Keeping consistent with Season 1’s theme, in today’s season Finale I’m recapping what I’ve been learning throughout Season 2 in terms of personal and professional growth, and sharing my most meaningful lessons with you in the hopes of helping you through whatever you might be struggling with.  And today I’m talking about a favorite topic of mine: playing big, and making the brave and bold decision to show up in your career in ways you never have before.

Oftentimes, we play small.  We’re afraid of taking risks, we’re afraid we’re not good enough, and we’re afraid of making mistakes.  But just because we feel afraid, it doesn’t mean we can’t choose to push ourselves towards greatness.  This episode is all about stepping into a bigger, bolder, and more authentic version of yourself so that you can turbocharge you career trajectory and your professional fulfillment. 

If you are ready to uplevel in your career and begin bringing the absolute best of what you have to offer to work with you, then this episode is for you.  Whether you want to do this in big ways or small, I want to give you the tools, the push, and the encouragement to go after whatever it is you are wanting.

I hope you enjoy this episode, and as always, please reach out to me!

You can find me on Instagram at @theartofspeakingup, or join the Facebook group by searching for ‘The Art of Speaking Up’ on Facebook.

And don’t forget: you are a wildly gifted, talented, and passionate being and your biggest impact on the world happens when you begin to truly embrace this.

Thanks for tuning in! (:

42 | Letting go of inhibition, femininity in hypermasculine work environments, balance vs. burnout & more with Camila Mize

We all want to feel strong and confident at work, no doubt.  But for women – it can be hard.  We often feel pressure to assimilate to the work culture that surrounds us, and this often means turning off our femininity and dulling our true personality in order to fit in with our environment.

And yet – our identity is the strongest foundation we have.  When we are able to come into ourselves and show up just as we are, we can begin to tap into our deepest source of power and self-confidence.

In today’s conversation, you’ll hear all about Camila’s journey through this very process.  As someone who identifies as being creative and feminine, it took Camila some time to come into her own and find a sense of strength and identity in the male dominated finance industry.

Camila’s story reminds us of an important truth that we should hold onto closely if we’re trying to build confidence.  She reminds us that true confidence is never about impressing the people around us.  In fact, it has very little to do with what people around us think.  Instead, it’s about those moments where we impress *ourselves.*  Whether it’s by doing something that feels scary or taking a big risk, the strongest form of confidence comes when we cheer ourselves on through those moments of intense vulnerability and fear.

You’ll also hear Camila talk about:

• Dropping perfectionism and detail orientation in order to grow as a leader
• The discomfort involved in growing and developing
• The struggle to set boundaries at work
• Career twists and turns and the challenges of finding one’s path
• The challenges of embracing femininity in masculine environments
• How Camila built confidence in unconventional ways by exploring her creative passions outside the workplace
• The importance of expressing yourself creatively outside of your job, and how following your curiosities outside work can help you grow at work
• The social and cultural challenges of being a woman
• What to do when you’re feeling stuck

If you are looking to build your confidence or find your voice in the workplace, then you will find today’s conversation rich with insights and nuggets that will serve you on your personal and professional path.

As always, thank you for tuning in, and be sure to get in touch!  You can reach me in Instagram at @theartofspeakingup – and do not hesitate to reach out.  I’d love to hear from you!

41 | How to tap into confidence when you’re deep in struggle + the hidden value in uncomfortable situations with Erin Foley

Feeling confident at work is pretty much a universal desire – I’ve never met anyone who wasn’t interested in feeling more confident professionally in some way, shape, or form.

 

That challenge with this, though, is that building confidence can often seem very elusive.  We know how we *want* to feel, but we aren’t quite sure how to get there.  This can lead us feeling stuck and frustrated, and not feeling empowered to move ourselves through whatever challenges we are experiencing.

 

I absolutely love today’s guest Erin Foley, because she turned the definition of self-confidence on its head (in a good way).  In this episode, I asked Erin what her definition of confidence is.  I was very curious to hear her perspective – after all, she’s a mindset coach who focuses on coaching working women like myself to trust themselves and their capabilities.

 

And her answer did not disappoint me.  Erin helped me see that confidence is not just about ‘feeling good,’ but rather, confidence a willingness to take courageous action in spite of feeling *not* good.  This blew my mind!  Not only was it incredibly liberating, but it also helped me see that confidence is not a feeling that we hope to feel.  Confidence is about the decisions that we choose to make.  This is incredibly empowering, because we can’t always choose to feel confident, but we *can* always choose to take the actions that we want to take, even if they seem intimidating or scary.

 

In this episode, you’ll also hear Erin talk about:

 

Contingent confidence vs. a growth mindset

 

Why successful people don’t need to be confident all the time

 

The relationship between mistakes and failure

 

The importance of playfulness

 

Impostor syndrome

 

Why it’s okay to feel awkward or uncomfortable at times

 

The importance of showing your true self at work

 

How to have patience with your professional goals

 

Tips to cultivate confidence

 

How to find value in hard things

 

To learn more about Erin, check out her website:  https://www.erinmfoley.com/

 

And to reach out to me or send a listener question in, you can reach me in Instagram (@theartofspeakingup) or via email (jessica@theartofspeakingup.com)

 

As always, thanks for tuning in, and catch you next week!

 

 

40 | Afraid you’re not good enough for your job? How to stop fearing incompetence with Erin Foley

Do you struggle to believe that you belong in, and are good enough for your job?  Do you feel like impostor syndrome has become a way of life for you?  If you struggle to believe in yourself and your capabilities, then today’s episode with mindset coach Erin Foley will be perfect for you. 

While we may feel alone in our mindset struggles, Erin’s coaching work and expertise sheds light on just how common it is to get stuck in the fear that we aren’t truly good enough for the jobs that we hold.  As Erin explains, it is totally normal to feel this way in our jobs, particularly when we’re in new environments, or taking on new roles or projects.  Rather than get caught in the negative spiral that this type of thinking can send us down, Erin encourages us to step back from our thoughts and get perspective on the situation.  Often, what we are perceiving as the truth is not as closely connected to reality as we may think it is.  In this conversation, Erin offers insights, advice, and techniques to help us break free from this negative thought pattern.

Erin also explains the difference between perfectionism and healthy ambition, and explains how the need for external approval drives perfectionistic tendencies.  She also delves into impostor syndrome, breaking down what it looks like, the different types of impostor syndrome, and what to do if we are stuck in it. 

This episode is perfect for anyone who is having troubles trusting that they are good enough for their job.  I found Erin’s wisdom to be refreshing, honest, insightful…and a huge relief.  Knowing that these feelings are normal, and knowing that there are ways to move through them is encouraging and uplifting.  I felt this sense of possibility and optimism while learning from Erin, and I hope you do as well.

To get in touch with Erin, check out her website at https://www.erinmfoley.com/, and as always, feel free to reach out to me on Instagram @theartofspeakingup

Thanks for tuning in, and catch you next week for part 2 of my conversation with Erin!

39 | What to do when you can’t stop fixating on your flaws and perceived weaknesses

Do you spend a lot of time and energy thinking about the areas where you struggle?  When you run into something that doesn’t come naturally to you, does it send you down a tailspin of self-criticism and worry?

As human beings, it’s normal for us to be good at some things and bad at others, and yet, when we run into our weaknesses in a professional setting, we seem to forget this.  We often hold ourselves to very high, superhuman standards that we wouldn’t hold ourselves to in other situations. 

So what gives?

Well, the workplace is a place where we’re expected to show excellence.  From the pressure to construct the perfect shiny resume to the tendency to avoid any open discussion about our struggles and vulnerabilities, the professional world often tells us (in subtle and often unintentional ways) that our flaws might not be welcome.

Now, this isn’t to say that we shouldn’t be aiming to do our best work.  It’s actually the very opposite – our best work comes about when we are ACCEPTING of the quirks and flaws that make us human.  When we accept the entire package of who we are, both the good and the bad, this is when we begin to build GENUINE confidence.  And genuine confidence is what gives us the fuel and the resilience to do our best work and overcome obstacles.

And so in embracing our weaknesses, we are actually helping ourselves become strong.  Our humanity is defined by how unique and diverse we are as humans, and this uniqueness includes our good parts and our bad parts.  As human beings, we are a little bit of everything, and denying the normalcy of our flaws keeps us in a state of perfectionistic fear that actually makes it harder for us to perform our best.

So what should you do about your struggles and weaknesses?  For one, stop worrying about them or hiding from them.  In doing so, you reinforce the story that these things make you ‘bad,’ and that they need to be hidden.  In being open and gentle with yourself, you reinforce the much more empowering belief that you are inherently valuable just as you are, flaws and all.

And second, be mindful of the fact that the professional world hasn’t quite figured out how to balance compassionate dialogue about where we struggle with the need for top performance.  I personally believe that these things go hand in hand, but it’s rare to see this idea in action in the professional world.  So just start by accepting yourself inwardly, and reminding yourself that the working world isn’t always ‘real.’  It’s a place where everyone projects their ‘best selves,’ and this can skew our perception of what is and isn’t normal and acceptable.

If you enjoyed this episode, let me know!  You can reach out to me or submit a listener question on Instagram: @theartofspeakingup – and if you’re enjoying the show, leave a rating in iTunes!